bipolar covalent and iconic bonds

i have long thought that there was a little mental disorder in my family and that i might be a little (ha) bipolar. today is just one of those days. last night i was almost brought to tears when hamidou's boss told me, "hang in there" out of no where. today, i started the day pretty much the same almost going to tears when talking to my co-worker, we'll call her "cheever" from here on out. :) but after my "re-observation" (because i failed the first one), suddenly i had a change of heart.

my kids really tried to be good. they came in quiet, very little chatter (the unusual). i know they are a little scared of the principal (as am i), but i felt they tried a little harder for me. i find it comforting that they tried. they didn't give me the finger and act like animals in front of her, they really wanted me to look good in front of her. Their effort made a world of difference to me and suddenly the sunlight from outside seemed brighter and the day wasn't half bad. i started to see that i had made some kind of bond with most of my students.

when the principal made her exit, the kids continued to work and i just stared at my entire room and realized that i do like most of my kids. all the kids that really work my nerves i can count on two hands. i'm glad i'm doing this and it took a little reminder from cheever and my past blog entries to remember why i am in this business.

it also helps that my mom is being supportive. she told me yesterday that maybe i shouldn't quit and today she told me it gets easier (message from my cousin). i know there are so many people out there that are behind me and i think that this is the reason hamidou's boss almost brought me to tears. she doesn't even really know me and she wanted me to succeed. i still believe that everyone deserves the right to a teacher who cares about their future and pushes them to do their best. I will try my best everyday, even if its not much, it will make the difference to them that i tried.